Advice for a young man trying to "come out"
#1
My nephew is gay. Most of my generation has long suspected it... going back to when he was in grade school, (he is now about 24). In any event, he has just recently "come out" to my daughter and swore her to secrecy. Of course she told me. But only because she knew I wouldn't judge him and she hoped that he might eventually come to me for advice on how to let some "others" in on it. Those "others" being my folks and his folks, (including my sister, who I despise). He is very close to my mom, (his grandma... she practically raised him). My mom is uber-conservative... she genuflects at the altar of Rush Limbaugh. However, she is not homophobic and I doubt that she'll judge her grandson. But he is still mortified to bring it up with her. 

I feel bad for the kid and his conflict. He should just tell everyone what's going on and not concern himself with how they feel about it. I guess that's easier said than done. That said, I also believe that discretion is the better part of valor. I think he should let those closest to him know about his sexuality and then leave it at that. I would think it best that he not show up with his boyfriend at Thanksgiving... at least for now. Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

There is a lot more to this... part of me wants to warn my mom so that her knee-jerk reaction doesn't hurt this kid. She needs to know that she has to be okay with it. I think she will be but I'm not 100% sure.

Kinda rambling here.... at this point he doesn't even know that I know. But I've "known" for years... maybe even before he did.
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#2
(07-15-2019, 06:16 PM)GCG Wrote: My nephew is gay. Most of my generation has long suspected it... going back to when he was in grade school, (he is now about 24). In any event, he has just recently "come out" to my daughter and swore her to secrecy. Of course she told me. But only because she knew I wouldn't judge him and she hoped that he might eventually come to me for advice on how to let some "others" in on it. Those "others" being my folks and his folks, (including my sister, who I despise). He is very close to my mom, (his grandma... she practically raised him). My mom is uber-conservative... she genuflects at the altar of Rush Limbaugh. However, she is not homophobic and I doubt that she'll judge her grandson. But he is still mortified to bring it up with her. 

I feel bad for the kid and his conflict. He should just tell everyone what's going on and not concern himself with how they feel about it. I guess that's easier said than done. That said, I also believe that discretion is the better part of valor. I think he should let those closest to him know about his sexuality and then leave it at that. I would think it best that he not show up with his boyfriend at Thanksgiving... at least for now. Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

There is a lot more to this... part of me wants to warn my mom so that her knee-jerk reaction doesn't hurt this kid. She needs to know that she has to be okay with it. I think she will be but I'm not 100% sure.

Kinda rambling here.... at this point he doesn't even know that I know. But I've "known" for years... maybe even before he did.
 I have a gay grandson. We were suspicious when he was like three years old because he always wanted to be the princess Laughing He loved my wife's pink silk robe and stuff like that. He's never "came out" to any of the family but I suppose he has with his mom and dad.
One of my granddaughters is gay. She comes for a visits and brings her girl friend. She doesn't hide it from anyone


  Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

Anyone who has trouble with him or anyone because they are gay is more than ignorant but in your moms case , I assume she is VERY old and has old notions that will never change? I think it's not worth the drama to let her know.

 I think the rest are going to find out anyway.
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#3
I have 2 cousins that are gay. The oldest one has always been "out". She's been married and they had a baby (with a sperm donor), divorced, and now in a relationship with a mother of 2. Her parents are very accepting. The younger one has been out, but not without issues. His parents are uber-right conservative Christians and basically only accepting of him if it isn't spoke of or acted upon around them. It's quite sad.

As for the older folks... my parents are in their 80's and very accepting. They have Christian backgrounds and beliefs... and feel that God makes us all. Period.

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#4
I'm sorry I don't have any useful advice to share. I wish the young man well though. I don't think happiness is so plentiful that anyone should be discouraged from seeking it.
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#5
No helpful advice, but it's sad that people still struggle with the coming out part. My kids are great. They have gay friends and they just are so inclusive, it's not even a thing.. I guess that's Millenials for you. It's just part of it all, no problems or issues or questions. An old girlfriend of mine left her very macho logger husband and got together with another woman and married her. It just seems so natural and not a big deal. I do agree he should just announce it, let it sit there and maybe take it slow on asking them to accept his boyfriend if they aren't able to handle that.
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#6
(07-15-2019, 07:49 PM)tvguy Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 06:16 PM)GCG Wrote: My nephew is gay. Most of my generation has long suspected it... going back to when he was in grade school, (he is now about 24). In any event, he has just recently "come out" to my daughter and swore her to secrecy. Of course she told me. But only because she knew I wouldn't judge him and she hoped that he might eventually come to me for advice on how to let some "others" in on it. Those "others" being my folks and his folks, (including my sister, who I despise). He is very close to my mom, (his grandma... she practically raised him). My mom is uber-conservative... she genuflects at the altar of Rush Limbaugh. However, she is not homophobic and I doubt that she'll judge her grandson. But he is still mortified to bring it up with her. 

I feel bad for the kid and his conflict. He should just tell everyone what's going on and not concern himself with how they feel about it. I guess that's easier said than done. That said, I also believe that discretion is the better part of valor. I think he should let those closest to him know about his sexuality and then leave it at that. I would think it best that he not show up with his boyfriend at Thanksgiving... at least for now. Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

There is a lot more to this... part of me wants to warn my mom so that her knee-jerk reaction doesn't hurt this kid. She needs to know that she has to be okay with it. I think she will be but I'm not 100% sure.

Kinda rambling here.... at this point he doesn't even know that I know. But I've "known" for years... maybe even before he did.
 I have a gay grandson. We were suspicious when he was like three years old because he always wanted to be the princess Laughing He loved my wife's pink silk robe and stuff like that. He's never "came out" to any of the family but I suppose he has with his mom and dad.
One of my granddaughters is gay. She comes for a visits and brings her girl friend. She doesn't hide it from anyone


  Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

Anyone who has trouble with him or anyone because they are gay is more than ignorant but in your moms case , I assume she is VERY old and has old notions that will never change? I think it's not worth the drama to let her know.

 I think the rest are going to find out anyway.

Yeah,

This kid used to love dressing up as  a princess and he liked to wear a skirt around. As far as I know he doesn't have a boyfriend and has never experienced anything other than attraction to males. It's probably safe to assume that he will end up in a relationship at some point. When that happens, I don't see the need for him to pretend that the guy doesn't exist. I'm just saying that it would be nice if they avoided any PDA when they are around people that are uncomfortable with it. For my part, I don't much care to be around PDA regardless of whether it's gay or hetero...

The really odd part of all of this is that years ago he became "born again"  and was totally sucked into a cult-like faction of Christianity. But now that he is confronting his sexuality he has calmed down on his religious fanaticism. He is still very conservative politically but maybe that is just a show for my mom. I can 100% guarantee you that she would rather he be a gay conservative than a straight liberal! I guess I agree with her on that. Being gay is just something that your are. But being liberal is something that you choose! There is no excuse for that! Big Grin
Reply
#7
(07-16-2019, 09:37 AM)GCG Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 07:49 PM)tvguy Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 06:16 PM)GCG Wrote: My nephew is gay. Most of my generation has long suspected it... going back to when he was in grade school, (he is now about 24). In any event, he has just recently "come out" to my daughter and swore her to secrecy. Of course she told me. But only because she knew I wouldn't judge him and she hoped that he might eventually come to me for advice on how to let some "others" in on it. Those "others" being my folks and his folks, (including my sister, who I despise). He is very close to my mom, (his grandma... she practically raised him). My mom is uber-conservative... she genuflects at the altar of Rush Limbaugh. However, she is not homophobic and I doubt that she'll judge her grandson. But he is still mortified to bring it up with her. 

I feel bad for the kid and his conflict. He should just tell everyone what's going on and not concern himself with how they feel about it. I guess that's easier said than done. That said, I also believe that discretion is the better part of valor. I think he should let those closest to him know about his sexuality and then leave it at that. I would think it best that he not show up with his boyfriend at Thanksgiving... at least for now. Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

There is a lot more to this... part of me wants to warn my mom so that her knee-jerk reaction doesn't hurt this kid. She needs to know that she has to be okay with it. I think she will be but I'm not 100% sure.

Kinda rambling here.... at this point he doesn't even know that I know. But I've "known" for years... maybe even before he did.
 I have a gay grandson. We were suspicious when he was like three years old because he always wanted to be the princess Laughing He loved my wife's pink silk robe and stuff like that. He's never "came out" to any of the family but I suppose he has with his mom and dad.
One of my granddaughters is gay. She comes for a visits and brings her girl friend. She doesn't hide it from anyone


  Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

Anyone who has trouble with him or anyone because they are gay is more than ignorant but in your moms case , I assume she is VERY old and has old notions that will never change? I think it's not worth the drama to let her know.

 I think the rest are going to find out anyway.

Yeah,

This kid used to love dressing up as  a princess and he liked to wear a skirt around. As far as I know he doesn't have a boyfriend and has never experienced anything other than attraction to males. It's probably safe to assume that he will end up in a relationship at some point. When that happens, I don't see the need for him to pretend that the guy doesn't exist. I'm just saying that it would be nice if they avoided any PDA when they are around people that are uncomfortable with it. For my part, I don't much care to be around PDA regardless of whether it's gay or hetero...

The really odd part of all of this is that years ago he became "born again"  and was totally sucked into a cult-like faction of Christianity. But now that he is confronting his sexuality he has calmed down on his religious fanaticism. He is still very conservative politically but maybe that is just a show for my mom. I can 100% guarantee you that she would rather he be a gay conservative than a straight liberal! I guess I agree with her on that. Being gay is just something that your are. But being liberal is something that you choose! There is no excuse for that! Big Grin

WTF is PDA? Laughing    as far as liberal versus gay. I know you are kidding but  it's funny how so many of my conservative friends agree with so many of the positions I take when I explain them and it's a for sure liberal view.

 I think most conservatives have this false notion of what a liberal is thanks to far right conservative talk shows and Fox news always showing the FAR left loon libs and PURPOSELY trying to denigrate ALL liberals.



"Being gay is just something that your are


And it means gays should be treated like anyone else. GASP.. that's a liberal view Razz
Reply
#8
(07-16-2019, 01:36 PM)tvguy Wrote:
(07-16-2019, 09:37 AM)GCG Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 07:49 PM)tvguy Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 06:16 PM)GCG Wrote: My nephew is gay. Most of my generation has long suspected it... going back to when he was in grade school, (he is now about 24). In any event, he has just recently "come out" to my daughter and swore her to secrecy. Of course she told me. But only because she knew I wouldn't judge him and she hoped that he might eventually come to me for advice on how to let some "others" in on it. Those "others" being my folks and his folks, (including my sister, who I despise). He is very close to my mom, (his grandma... she practically raised him). My mom is uber-conservative... she genuflects at the altar of Rush Limbaugh. However, she is not homophobic and I doubt that she'll judge her grandson. But he is still mortified to bring it up with her. 

I feel bad for the kid and his conflict. He should just tell everyone what's going on and not concern himself with how they feel about it. I guess that's easier said than done. That said, I also believe that discretion is the better part of valor. I think he should let those closest to him know about his sexuality and then leave it at that. I would think it best that he not show up with his boyfriend at Thanksgiving... at least for now. Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

There is a lot more to this... part of me wants to warn my mom so that her knee-jerk reaction doesn't hurt this kid. She needs to know that she has to be okay with it. I think she will be but I'm not 100% sure.

Kinda rambling here.... at this point he doesn't even know that I know. But I've "known" for years... maybe even before he did.
 I have a gay grandson. We were suspicious when he was like three years old because he always wanted to be the princess Laughing He loved my wife's pink silk robe and stuff like that. He's never "came out" to any of the family but I suppose he has with his mom and dad.
One of my granddaughters is gay. She comes for a visits and brings her girl friend. She doesn't hide it from anyone


  Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

Anyone who has trouble with him or anyone because they are gay is more than ignorant but in your moms case , I assume she is VERY old and has old notions that will never change? I think it's not worth the drama to let her know.

 I think the rest are going to find out anyway.

Yeah,

This kid used to love dressing up as  a princess and he liked to wear a skirt around. As far as I know he doesn't have a boyfriend and has never experienced anything other than attraction to males. It's probably safe to assume that he will end up in a relationship at some point. When that happens, I don't see the need for him to pretend that the guy doesn't exist. I'm just saying that it would be nice if they avoided any PDA when they are around people that are uncomfortable with it. For my part, I don't much care to be around PDA regardless of whether it's gay or hetero...

The really odd part of all of this is that years ago he became "born again"  and was totally sucked into a cult-like faction of Christianity. But now that he is confronting his sexuality he has calmed down on his religious fanaticism. He is still very conservative politically but maybe that is just a show for my mom. I can 100% guarantee you that she would rather he be a gay conservative than a straight liberal! I guess I agree with her on that. Being gay is just something that your are. But being liberal is something that you choose! There is no excuse for that! Big Grin

WTF is PDA? Laughing    as far as liberal versus gay. I know you are kidding but  it's funny how so many of my conservative friends agree with so many of the positions I take when I explain them and it's a for sure liberal view.

 I think most conservatives have this false notion of what a liberal is thanks to far right conservative talk shows and Fox news always showing the FAR left loon libs and PURPOSELY trying to denigrate ALL liberals.



"Being gay is just something that your are


And it means gays should be treated like anyone else. GASP.. that's a liberal view Razz

PDA = Public Display of Affection

Are you implying that MSNBC doesn't pretend that all conservatives are far right, Trump loving, homophobic, racists?
Reply
#9
(07-16-2019, 09:37 AM)GCG Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 07:49 PM)tvguy Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 06:16 PM)GCG Wrote: My nephew is gay. Most of my generation has long suspected it... going back to when he was in grade school, (he is now about 24). In any event, he has just recently "come out" to my daughter and swore her to secrecy. Of course she told me. But only because she knew I wouldn't judge him and she hoped that he might eventually come to me for advice on how to let some "others" in on it. Those "others" being my folks and his folks, (including my sister, who I despise). He is very close to my mom, (his grandma... she practically raised him). My mom is uber-conservative... she genuflects at the altar of Rush Limbaugh. However, she is not homophobic and I doubt that she'll judge her grandson. But he is still mortified to bring it up with her. 

I feel bad for the kid and his conflict. He should just tell everyone what's going on and not concern himself with how they feel about it. I guess that's easier said than done. That said, I also believe that discretion is the better part of valor. I think he should let those closest to him know about his sexuality and then leave it at that. I would think it best that he not show up with his boyfriend at Thanksgiving... at least for now. Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

There is a lot more to this... part of me wants to warn my mom so that her knee-jerk reaction doesn't hurt this kid. She needs to know that she has to be okay with it. I think she will be but I'm not 100% sure.

Kinda rambling here.... at this point he doesn't even know that I know. But I've "known" for years... maybe even before he did.
 I have a gay grandson. We were suspicious when he was like three years old because he always wanted to be the princess :lol: He loved my wife's pink silk robe and stuff like that. He's never "came out" to any of the family but I suppose he has with his mom and dad.
One of my granddaughters is gay. She comes for a visits and brings her girl friend. She doesn't hide it from anyone


  Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

Anyone who has trouble with him or anyone because they are gay is more than ignorant but in your moms case , I assume she is VERY old and has old notions that will never change? I think it's not worth the drama to let her know.

 I think the rest are going to find out anyway.

Yeah,

This kid used to love dressing up as  a princess and he liked to wear a skirt around. As far as I know he doesn't have a boyfriend and has never experienced anything other than attraction to males. It's probably safe to assume that he will end up in a relationship at some point. When that happens, I don't see the need for him to pretend that the guy doesn't exist. I'm just saying that it would be nice if they avoided any PDA when they are around people that are uncomfortable with it. For my part, I don't much care to be around PDA regardless of whether it's gay or hetero...

The really odd part of all of this is that years ago he became "born again"  and was totally sucked into a cult-like faction of Christianity. But now that he is confronting his sexuality he has calmed down on his religious fanaticism. He is still very conservative politically but maybe that is just a show for my mom. I can 100% guarantee you that she would rather he be a gay conservative than a straight liberal! I guess I agree with her on that. Being gay is just something that your are. But being liberal is something that you choose! There is no excuse for that! :D

I suppose so. I choose to hold my own and women's bodies independent from anyone elses agenda.  I choose to not give a shit if you are gay or some other color or religion than me. I choose to believe that health care is a universal human right.  I also choose to believe people should carry guns if they like;, that  2nd and 3rd term abortions are wrong except under special conditions, I believe we can somehow do this health care thing differently, I choose to support your right to practice your religion and traditions as long as you don't mess with mine.  I choose to believe that if we are going to do this border thing, we can do it better. I choose to believe that antivaxers put me and those I care about at risk.  I also choose to believe this POTUS is a raving, racist, sexist, misyognynistic, paranoid, narcissistic, unstable child. And I choose to believe that extreme, far rights are by far the biggest Goddamn snowflakes I have ever encountered.
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#10
(07-16-2019, 03:24 PM)Juniper Wrote:
(07-16-2019, 09:37 AM)GCG Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 07:49 PM)tvguy Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 06:16 PM)GCG Wrote: My nephew is gay. Most of my generation has long suspected it... going back to when he was in grade school, (he is now about 24). In any event, he has just recently "come out" to my daughter and swore her to secrecy. Of course she told me. But only because she knew I wouldn't judge him and she hoped that he might eventually come to me for advice on how to let some "others" in on it. Those "others" being my folks and his folks, (including my sister, who I despise). He is very close to my mom, (his grandma... she practically raised him). My mom is uber-conservative... she genuflects at the altar of Rush Limbaugh. However, she is not homophobic and I doubt that she'll judge her grandson. But he is still mortified to bring it up with her. 

I feel bad for the kid and his conflict. He should just tell everyone what's going on and not concern himself with how they feel about it. I guess that's easier said than done. That said, I also believe that discretion is the better part of valor. I think he should let those closest to him know about his sexuality and then leave it at that. I would think it best that he not show up with his boyfriend at Thanksgiving... at least for now. Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

There is a lot more to this... part of me wants to warn my mom so that her knee-jerk reaction doesn't hurt this kid. She needs to know that she has to be okay with it. I think she will be but I'm not 100% sure.

Kinda rambling here.... at this point he doesn't even know that I know. But I've "known" for years... maybe even before he did.
 I have a gay grandson. We were suspicious when he was like three years old because he always wanted to be the princess Laughing He loved my wife's pink silk robe and stuff like that. He's never "came out" to any of the family but I suppose he has with his mom and dad.
One of my granddaughters is gay. She comes for a visits and brings her girl friend. She doesn't hide it from anyone


  Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

Anyone who has trouble with him or anyone because they are gay is more than ignorant but in your moms case , I assume she is VERY old and has old notions that will never change? I think it's not worth the drama to let her know.

 I think the rest are going to find out anyway.

Yeah,

This kid used to love dressing up as  a princess and he liked to wear a skirt around. As far as I know he doesn't have a boyfriend and has never experienced anything other than attraction to males. It's probably safe to assume that he will end up in a relationship at some point. When that happens, I don't see the need for him to pretend that the guy doesn't exist. I'm just saying that it would be nice if they avoided any PDA when they are around people that are uncomfortable with it. For my part, I don't much care to be around PDA regardless of whether it's gay or hetero...

The really odd part of all of this is that years ago he became "born again"  and was totally sucked into a cult-like faction of Christianity. But now that he is confronting his sexuality he has calmed down on his religious fanaticism. He is still very conservative politically but maybe that is just a show for my mom. I can 100% guarantee you that she would rather he be a gay conservative than a straight liberal! I guess I agree with her on that. Being gay is just something that your are. But being liberal is something that you choose! There is no excuse for that! Big Grin

I suppose so. I choose to hold my own and women's bodies independent from anyone elses agenda.  I choose to not give a shit if you are gay or some other color or religion than me. I choose to believe that health care is a universal human right.  I also choose to believe people should carry guns if they like;, that  2nd and 3rd term abortions are wrong except under special conditions, I believe we can somehow do this health care thing differently, I choose to support your right to practice your religion and traditions as long as you don't mess with mine.  I choose to believe that if we are going to do this border thing, we can do it better. I choose to believe that antivaxers put me and those I care about at risk.  I also choose to believe this POTUS is a raving, racist, sexist, misyognynistic, paranoid, narcissistic, unstable child. And I choose to believe that extreme, far rights are by far the biggest Goddamn snowflakes I have ever encountered.
Well I agree with most of what you say above.... but I'm sure we'd disagree on the how to figure out the health care problem.
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#11
Gay boys gonna boy and lesbians gonna do what they do.
When other people’s feelings are more important than your own then things are screwed up.
Reply
#12
(07-16-2019, 02:10 PM)GCG Wrote:
(07-16-2019, 01:36 PM)tvguy Wrote:
(07-16-2019, 09:37 AM)GCG Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 07:49 PM)tvguy Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 06:16 PM)GCG Wrote: My nephew is gay. Most of my generation has long suspected it... going back to when he was in grade school, (he is now about 24). In any event, he has just recently "cinome out" to my daughter and swore her to secrecy. Of course she told me. But only because she knew I wouldn't judge him and she hoped that he might eventually come to me for advice on how to let some "others" in on it. Those "others" being my folks and his folks, (including my sister, who I despise). He is very close to my mom, (his grandma... she practically raised him). My mom is uber-conservative... she genuflects at the altar of Rush Limbaugh. However, she is not homophobic and I doubt that she'll judge her grandson. But he is still mortified to bring it up with her. 

I feel bad for the kid and his conflict. He should just tell everyone what's going on and not concern himself with how they feel about it. I guess that's easier said than done. That said, I also believe that discretion is the better part of valor. I think he should let those closest to him know about his sexuality and then leave it at that. I would think it best that he not show up with his boyfriend at Thanksgiving... at least for now. Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

There is a lot more to this... part of me wants to warn my mom so that her knee-jerk reaction doesn't hurt this kid. She needs to know that she has to be okay with it. I think she will be but I'm not 100% sure.

Kinda rambling here.... at this point he doesn't even know that I know. But I've "known" for years... maybe even before he did.
 I have a gay grandson. We were suspicious when he was like three years old because he always wanted to be the princess Laughing He loved my wife's pink silk robe and stuff like that. He's never "came out" to any of the family but I suppose he has with his mom and dad.
One of my granddaughters is gay. She comes for a visits and brings her girl friend. She doesn't hide it from anyone


  Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

Anyone who has trouble with him or anyone because they are gay is more than ignorant but in your moms case , I assume she is VERY old and has old notions that will never change? I think it's not worth the drama to let her know.

 I think the rest are going to find out anyway.

Yeah,

This kid used to love dressing up as  a princess and he liked to wear a skirt around. As far as I know he doesn't have a boyfriend and has never experienced anything other than attraction to males. It's probably safe to assume that he will end up in a relationship at some point. When that happens, I don't see the need for him to pretend that the guy doesn't exist. I'm just saying that it would be nice if they avoided any PDA when they are around people that are uncomfortable with it. For my part, I don't much care to be around PDA regardless of whether it's gay or hetero...

The really odd part of all of this is that years ago he became "born again"  and was totally sucked into a cult-like faction of Christianity. But now that he is confronting his sexuality he has calmed down on his religious fanaticism. He is still very conservative politically but maybe that is just a show for my mom. I can 100% guarantee you that she would rather he be a gay conservative than a straight liberal! I guess I agree with her on that. Being gay is just something that your are. But being liberal is something that you choose! There is no excuse for that! Big Grin

WTF is PDA? Laughing    as far as liberal versus gay. I know you are kidding but  it's funny how so many of my conservative friends agree with so many of the positions I take when I explain them and it's a for sure liberal view.

 I think most conservatives have this false notion of what a liberal is thanks to far right conservative talk shows and Fox news always showing the FAR left loon libs and PURPOSELY trying to denigrate ALL liberals.



"Being gay is just something that your are


And it means gays should be treated like anyone else. GASP.. that's a liberal view Razz

PDA = Public Display of Affection

Are you implying that MSNBC doesn't pretend that all conservatives are far right, Trump loving, homophobic, racists?

I don't watch MSNBC Network ABC is far too f****** liberal for me
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#13
Funny thing about 'coming out', most people already knew.
I have often said, the gays are the last to know.
Reply
#14
(07-16-2019, 04:23 PM)GCG Wrote:
(07-16-2019, 03:24 PM)Juniper Wrote:
(07-16-2019, 09:37 AM)GCG Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 07:49 PM)tvguy Wrote:
(07-15-2019, 06:16 PM)GCG Wrote: My nephew is gay. Most of my generation has long suspected it... going back to when he was in grade school, (he is now about 24). In any event, he has just recently "come out" to my daughter and swore her to secrecy. Of course she told me. But only because she knew I wouldn't judge him and she hoped that he might eventually come to me for advice on how to let some "others" in on it. Those "others" being my folks and his folks, (including my sister, who I despise). He is very close to my mom, (his grandma... she practically raised him). My mom is uber-conservative... she genuflects at the altar of Rush Limbaugh. However, she is not homophobic and I doubt that she'll judge her grandson. But he is still mortified to bring it up with her. 

I feel bad for the kid and his conflict. He should just tell everyone what's going on and not concern himself with how they feel about it. I guess that's easier said than done. That said, I also believe that discretion is the better part of valor. I think he should let those closest to him know about his sexuality and then leave it at that. I would think it best that he not show up with his boyfriend at Thanksgiving... at least for now. Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

There is a lot more to this... part of me wants to warn my mom so that her knee-jerk reaction doesn't hurt this kid. She needs to know that she has to be okay with it. I think she will be but I'm not 100% sure.

Kinda rambling here.... at this point he doesn't even know that I know. But I've "known" for years... maybe even before he did.
 I have a gay grandson. We were suspicious when he was like three years old because he always wanted to be the princess Laughing He loved my wife's pink silk robe and stuff like that. He's never "came out" to any of the family but I suppose he has with his mom and dad.
One of my granddaughters is gay. She comes for a visits and brings her girl friend. She doesn't hide it from anyone


  Is it so wrong of me to suggest that he give those that have trouble with this some time to soak it in?

Anyone who has trouble with him or anyone because they are gay is more than ignorant but in your moms case , I assume she is VERY old and has old notions that will never change? I think it's not worth the drama to let her know.

 I think the rest are going to find out anyway.

Yeah,

This kid used to love dressing up as  a princess and he liked to wear a skirt around. As far as I know he doesn't have a boyfriend and has never experienced anything other than attraction to males. It's probably safe to assume that he will end up in a relationship at some point. When that happens, I don't see the need for him to pretend that the guy doesn't exist. I'm just saying that it would be nice if they avoided any PDA when they are around people that are uncomfortable with it. For my part, I don't much care to be around PDA regardless of whether it's gay or hetero...

The really odd part of all of this is that years ago he became "born again"  and was totally sucked into a cult-like faction of Christianity. But now that he is confronting his sexuality he has calmed down on his religious fanaticism. He is still very conservative politically but maybe that is just a show for my mom. I can 100% guarantee you that she would rather he be a gay conservative than a straight liberal! I guess I agree with her on that. Being gay is just something that your are. But being liberal is something that you choose! There is no excuse for that! Big Grin

I suppose so. I choose to hold my own and women's bodies independent from anyone elses agenda.  I choose to not give a shit if you are gay or some other color or religion than me. I choose to believe that health care is a universal human right.  I also choose to believe people should carry guns if they like;, that  2nd and 3rd term abortions are wrong except under special conditions, I believe we can somehow do this health care thing differently, I choose to support your right to practice your religion and traditions as long as you don't mess with mine.  I choose to believe that if we are going to do this border thing, we can do it better. I choose to believe that antivaxers put me and those I care about at risk.  I also choose to believe this POTUS is a raving, racist, sexist, misyognynistic, paranoid, narcissistic, unstable child. And I choose to believe that extreme, far rights are by far the biggest Goddamn snowflakes I have ever encountered.
Well I agree with most of what you say above.... but I'm sure we'd disagree on the how to figure out the health care problem.
Well, I'm not a fan of Obama care.
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#15
Healthcare is something everybody requires at some point in their lives unless they’re lucky enough to drop dead in their tracks.
That’s why healthcare should be a right in today’s world.
And between my ex always being sick with something and me and my current problems I have plenty of experience interacting with the medical/insurance industry.
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