The 'Inappropriate' Outfit That Got My Daughter Into Trouble
#1
So weird of this principal! I think this young lady looks far better than most middle school aged girls I see in hot weather. Confused
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Yesterday I got one of "those" phone calls that parents dread. Admittedly it was rather low on the scale of parental dread. One might reasonably say it was close to the bottom of the dreaded scale, but it was on there.

My daughter had been escorted to the front office by the principal, and was cooling her heels there until a parent could come in and sort stuff out. Her life of crime had begun.

In most junior high schools, all the students are treated like criminals -- but only some rise to the challenge. My daughter graduates from junior high in two weeks, so she is making it in just under the wire.

Having your parents called in is one of the most significant punishments that can befall a junior high student, and it prefaces all of the more severe punitive actions. When your parents are called, you are in trouble; you have done something quite wrong.

There are significant consequences to parents being called in. Our town, Tooele, is a bedroom community for most folks; the average commute to work is in excess of 30 minutes. This means that, when they're called in to school, many parents are expected to take an hour off work, and the student is expected to sit for at least one class-period in the office.

The office has large windows so that the student is on display to his or her peers throughout the interminable wait time. The bell rings and hundreds of students rush past the offender-on-display; some linger long enough to make obscene gestures. Some students might revel in the attention, but in most adolescent minds, this is cruel and unusual punishment.

What had my daughter done to deserve this punishment? Was it some valiant gesture of defiance against a fascist dehumanizing system, or was there cruelty and torture involved? I found it hard to picture her engaged (or at least getting caught) in either of these types of actions, but I was hoping for the first.

After spinning the possibilities in my mind, I was not prepared for the actual nature of her offense. She was dressed inappropriately.

I am not the best judge of "appropriate" dress for a 14-year-old girl. I try, but it is a skill I have no intention of using for very long. I tried to circumvent my need for it at all by suggesting that both my daughters wear hospital scrubs till they graduate the 12th grade, but that was apparently "not happening." I know that if I dressed myself from my younger daughter's wardrobe, it would be wildly inappropriate regardless of what I chose. Now my lack of attention had forced her into a life of crime. It is always the parent's fault.

Luckily I was working from home, so I took a camera and rushed over to the junior high school with some dungarees and a sack-like shirt for her to change into. This is a picture of her in the school's front office, and this is the apparently inappropriate outfit she was wearing.

[Image: 2012-05-23-Sent_home.jpg]

was shocked at my ineptitude. The outfit actually looked appropriate to me; especially given the fact that it was 86F (30C) and the AC in the junior high was not working well outside of the front office. How could I be so blind as to have missed the fact that my daughter was dressed as a harlot, and presented a danger to all the boys in the school? I read "Great Expectations" once. Just because the school might champion some Dickensian imagery does not mean they must bow to them all. What vile boy-crushing monster had my daughter become, and why couldn't I see it?

I began to think : "Luckily the school administration can look at her and see her as a provocative female," but then I thought... no... that is extremely creepy. I tried to think: "Luckily the school administration can look at her though the eyes of hormone-addled teenage boys to see her as provocative," but then I thought... no... that is weird-creepy.

Imagine sitting in a class where you knew the teacher was literally looking through your clothing to see you as a provocateur? I began wondering if transferring her to a new class in the last two weeks of school would do more harm than good.

It turns out that the principal himself had personally identified her as inappropriately dressed. He had walked up to her during lunchtime and identified her crime where nobody else could. I can't help but think that the principal's action creates an unhealthy atmosphere in his school.

What does it say to the teachers who had her in class earlier in the day, and didn't notice her inappropriate dress? What does it say to me -- the parent who maintains that her outfit was perfectly OK for school? Will my daughter and her classmates now spend more time thinking about their outfits than their schoolwork -- the real task at hand?

Rest of story:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/sparker/da...ffPostBlog
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#2

Full burka is what I recommend


[Image: rron183l.jpg]
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#3
(05-23-2012, 08:06 PM)chuck white Wrote: Full burka is what I recommend


[Image: rron183l.jpg]

I think the principal has some kind of problem with this girl other than how she dresses.
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#4
(05-23-2012, 08:13 PM)Clone Wrote: I think the principal has some kind of problem with this girl other than how she dresses.

Agreed!
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#5
Utah. Where the dresses are supposed to drape the ankles but the girls are supposed to breed like flies.
[Image: GilElvgren.jpg]
Big Grin
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#6
Maybe she doesn't have underwear on.


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#7
Why do we live with a system that delivers our children, into the hands of freaks?
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#8
(05-23-2012, 09:49 PM)illcommandante Wrote: Why do we live with a system that delivers our children, into the hands of freaks?

Because we're too tight to pay teachers well. That's why.
A teacher should make at least as much as a plumber or electrician or nurse.
It's a cryin' shame.
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#9
(05-23-2012, 10:26 PM)Clone Wrote:
(05-23-2012, 09:49 PM)illcommandante Wrote: Why do we live with a system that delivers our children, into the hands of freaks?

Because we're too tight to pay teachers well. That's why.
A teacher should make at least as much as a plumber or electrician or nurse.
It's a cryin' shame.

And anybody in the school that doesn't teach should make less. (administrators, superintendent, district managers, principles, etc)

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#10
(05-23-2012, 10:30 PM)chuck white Wrote:
(05-23-2012, 10:26 PM)Clone Wrote:
(05-23-2012, 09:49 PM)illcommandante Wrote: Why do we live with a system that delivers our children, into the hands of freaks?

Because we're too tight to pay teachers well. That's why.
A teacher should make at least as much as a plumber or electrician or nurse.
It's a cryin' shame.

And anybody in the school that doesn't teach should make less. (administrators, superintendent, district managers, principles, etc)

No kidding...you're right!
Worthless as tits on a boar hog.
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#11
I have many thoughts on this and some of the comments I read. Well here it goes. I am wondering if this is the way the dress was in the class room. Then I had the thought well maybe the skirt did some rising up when she sat down, and she had no idea how to sit in a dress and that caused some distractions. My other thoughts on it was that the teacher was an ass. I have had experience in all 3. My oldest daughter had a black skirt that was such a nice thing, perfect length for the dress code, well that child could roll that skirt in such a way that it became a mini skirt and she could do it and it looked good. The sitting part, happens all the time, even yesterday the kids had a promotion ceremony and there were many girls wearing dresses that had their legs wide open and teachers were going around and were telling the girls they needed sit with their legs together because many people had a full view up the girls dresses. And I also had a daughter that had the teacher that was an ass. One day I was called to the school because my daughter's shirt was a tank top, well the aid the teacher that called me had the exact same tank top on. And she didn't get in trouble. So smart ass me took a picture of both of girls together went to the superintendent and asked why was my daughter asked to change and not the other girl, he admitted there was a problem with the enforcement of the dress code at the schools.
So in this case, it could of been any number of things.
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#12
When I was in school, we had a dress code that required the girls to wear dresses,
now they get in trouble for it.
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#13
(05-24-2012, 06:53 AM)bbqboy Wrote: When I was in school, we had a dress code that required the girls to wear dresses,
now they get in trouble for it.

We didn't have a dress code when I went to school, they were just inventing clothes.
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#14
When I was in high school mini-skirts and hot pants were in... usually worn with go go boots or really tall wedges.

That outfit screams "SCHOOLMARM!!!" Thumbs Down Kids now days! Rolling Eyes


Laughing Laughing Evil
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#15
You know that Britney Spears Catholic skirt look is completely appropriate IMO. I miss Catholic school.Rolling Eyes
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#16
Why doesn't the author of the article say what the principle found "Inappropriate"?
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#17
(05-24-2012, 05:50 PM)Tiamat Wrote: Why doesn't the author of the article say what the principle found "Inappropriate"?

Her skirt was to long.Evil
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#18
(05-23-2012, 10:26 PM)Clone Wrote:
(05-23-2012, 09:49 PM)illcommandante Wrote: Why do we live with a system that delivers our children, into the hands of freaks?

Because we're too tight to pay teachers well. That's why.
A teacher should make at least as much as a plumber or electrician or nurse.
It's a cryin' shame.

I think teachers do very well.

Year Position First Name Last Name Wages Payroll
Costs Insurance
Costs Pension* Total
Compensation
2010 TEACHER $81,780.23 $23,352.00 $19,581.32 N/A $124,713.55
I edited the name for this post. The link is for parkrose school district.

http://oregoncapitolnews.com/govdocs/oth...-district/

Look and see the salary an electrician in this valley will get $30.02 per hr. plus bene's.
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#19
Electricians are definitely more important to our kids' future than teachers.
Just ask Wonky and TV.
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#20
(05-24-2012, 05:50 PM)Tiamat Wrote: Why doesn't the author of the article say what the principle found "Inappropriate"?

She did...right at the bottom of the blog after people asked questions:

An update from the blogger in response to your questions:
When I picked her up the principal was nowhere to be found, so he did not talk to me directly. I was not given the courtesy of an explanation. My daughter was apparently told that the skirt's hem was half an inch (a little over a cm) too short.

I took the photo in the front office while the administrative staff looked on in horror. I could have taken photos of a couple kids, who were apparently violating the same type of code on school grounds, on my way to and from the office that day, but I thought that might come across wrong. The school's yearbook came out that same day and had pictures of kids with shorter hems than what my daughter had. I think there was selective enforcement going on.

I would like to point out that the level of incredulity towards the idea that this is an inappropriate outfit for junior high school expressed in the comments for this post has really made my daughter feel great. The Kafka-esque way that junior high administrators dole out punishment and make rules dehumanizes kids. They feel unimportant and marginalized. Seeing this type of response to her situation (especially with so many people personally relating) means a lot to her and kids like her. The attention does make her a little uneasy. She says that I could have chosen a better picture.


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