Absolutely Ridiculous
#1
Okay, so my grandson came home from school in disgrace. He had a three-copy report about his behavior which had to be signed and returned by the parents. One copy was for them, one for the teacher and the other for his permanent record.

His crime? He called another kid 'fat'. Okay, that is not nice. It is not to be encouraged. But all this fuss? Plus he is expected to write an apology note to the kid. He can barely write his own name.

I understand completely all schools' desire to combat bullying and impress upon students the need to respect others. It amazes me that this could be turned into such a Major Event. We're talking kindergartners here.

Mad
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#2
If he goes on to a long career of school and never commits another act of bullying which gets him in trouble, you can all laugh about this later. Smiling
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#3
Refresh my memory...age group?

This is the world of "extremes" for simple things while major issues are excused by irrational thought.

I would send the paper back in a envelope, shredded, and a note stating,

"Focus on the real issues!"

The child has been counseled
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#4
Overkill, besides "fat" is probably the normRazz
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#5
Now the kid can grow up to be just like ponder.
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#6
He needs to be PC and refer to the kid as, gravitationally challenged.
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#7
(11-08-2013, 06:21 PM)orygunluvr Wrote: Now the kid can grow up to be just like ponder.

So see, I told you they'll laugh about it later then. Laughing
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#8
(11-08-2013, 06:22 PM)chuck white Wrote: He needs to be PC and refer to the kid as, gravitationally challenged.

No, not that. He's just short for his weight.
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#9
If it's his first offense... they went overboard. Rolling Eyes
If it's a habitual problem? I don't know...
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#10
Scrapper, he has been warned a few times before this incident so he deserved to be censured. I don't disagree with that aspect of it, but the school went overboard trying to cover their posterior. I told my daughter not to write the apology note. When he learns how to write, then maybe, but until then, he has been counseled and hopefully it won't happen again. (What do we do if it does, though?!). Eek!
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#11
There's always military school. God only knows I got threatened with it a lot. Laughing
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#12
(11-09-2013, 04:53 PM)TennisMom Wrote: Scrapper, he has been warned a few times before this incident so he deserved to be censured. I don't disagree with that aspect of it, but the school went overboard trying to cover their posterior. I told my daughter not to write the apology note. When he learns how to write, then maybe, but until then, he has been counseled and hopefully it won't happen again. (What do we do if it does, though?!). Eek!

Unfortunately, in this sue happy society, if they don't cover their posterior, they risk having some sue happy parent of an over weight child go after them for not protecting him from bullying.
I grew up a fat kid.
Rethink not having an apology note written. Please.
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#13
Kids need to learn to deal with adversity. Kids need to know that there are people out there that say mean things. Shining this big light on the situation is making matters worse for the victim.

This is how it should go:

**************
Grandson: Hey fatty!

Fat kid: The day I let an idiot like you get under my skin is the day I'll be worried. In the meanwhile... get bent.
**************

*Not sure if that verbiage fits the age group... put in whatever retort fits.

TM... not meant to insult your grandson but I'm in your corner when it comes to all of this over-reaction. Let the kids be kids. This hardly rises to the level of bullying. Part of being a kid is making fun of and being made fun of. Its part of what prepares us for the real world.
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#14
(11-09-2013, 04:53 PM)TennisMom Wrote: Scrapper, he has been warned a few times before this incident so he deserved to be censured. I don't disagree with that aspect of it, but the school went overboard trying to cover their posterior. I told my daughter not to write the apology note. When he learns how to write, then maybe, but until then, he has been counseled and hopefully it won't happen again. (What do we do if it does, though?!). Eek!

Feed him lots of fatty foods and corn syrup, than he know what it's like to be fat.
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#15
So, help me out here. Since when is asking a parent to sign a paper that says they understand the problem and asking a kid to write an apology, such a big fuss and inconvenience? Where is all the drama here?

As GCG says, kids need to learn to deal with adversity. In this case, that also takes the form of being held accountable for your actions. It appears the little guy didn't get it the first few times he had issues and was "counseled" so the heat needs to be turned up a little, to the horror of grandma, who just can't accept that her little angel may need punishment to learn that unacceptable behavior is truly unacceptable.

This is how kids grow to get into more trouble. Adults in their lives need to hold them accountable for their actions. Signing a piece of paper and writing "I'm sorry" (I really doubt the school is expecting a multi-paragraph dissertation) is not going to crush the little guy or the adults in his life.
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#16
(11-10-2013, 10:19 AM)gapper Wrote: So, help me out here. Since when is asking a parent to sign a paper that says they understand the problem and asking a kid to write an apology, such a big fuss and inconvenience? Where is all the drama here?

As GCG says, kids need to learn to deal with adversity. In this case, that also takes the form of being held accountable for your actions. It appears the little guy didn't get it the first few times he had issues and was "counseled" so the heat needs to be turned up a little, to the horror of grandma, who just can't accept that her little angel may need punishment to learn that unacceptable behavior is truly unacceptable.

This is how kids grow to get into more trouble. Adults in their lives need to hold them accountable for their actions. Signing a piece of paper and writing "I'm sorry" (I really doubt the school is expecting a multi-paragraph dissertation) is not going to crush the little guy or the adults in his life.

I'm OK with the kid's parents acknowledging the problem. I'm even okay with the parents telling the kid to make amends of some sort. I'm NOT okay with the school deciding how this is to be handled. IMHO, the situation has not yet reached that point.

I believe that the BEST solution is for the parents of the "victim" to use this as a learning experience for their kid. Teach him to stand up for himself.

We can't have the state stepping in and exerting authority over every little thing. Its a trend that needs reversing.
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#17
You sound like you're endorsing bullying.
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#18
(11-10-2013, 10:54 AM)PonderThis Wrote: You sound like you're endorsing bullying.

I was thinking the same thing.
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#19
(11-10-2013, 10:49 AM)GoCometsGo Wrote:
(11-10-2013, 10:19 AM)gapper Wrote: So, help me out here. Since when is asking a parent to sign a paper that says they understand the problem and asking a kid to write an apology, such a big fuss and inconvenience? Where is all the drama here?

As GCG says, kids need to learn to deal with adversity. In this case, that also takes the form of being held accountable for your actions. It appears the little guy didn't get it the first few times he had issues and was "counseled" so the heat needs to be turned up a little, to the horror of grandma, who just can't accept that her little angel may need punishment to learn that unacceptable behavior is truly unacceptable.

This is how kids grow to get into more trouble. Adults in their lives need to hold them accountable for their actions. Signing a piece of paper and writing "I'm sorry" (I really doubt the school is expecting a multi-paragraph dissertation) is not going to crush the little guy or the adults in his life.

I'm OK with the kid's parents acknowledging the problem. I'm even okay with the parents telling the kid to make amends of some sort. I'm NOT okay with the school deciding how this is to be handled. IMHO, the situation has not yet reached that point.

I believe that the BEST solution is for the parents of the "victim" to use this as a learning experience for their kid. Teach him to stand up for himself.

We can't have the state stepping in and exerting authority over every little thing. Its a trend that needs reversing.
If the boy had been taught proper behavior at home, this would not be a school issue, nor should it have to be. Intervention such as this after a "few" other instances, is not exerting authority over every little thing, however, they have the right to exert that authority, as I see it.

If the family doesn't want the state mandating his conduct in a public school, they should send him to a private school. My tax dollars help pay for that public school. I want it teaching kids that you are accountable for your actions. If the first few warnings didn't work, it seems to me this was a natural progression.

Too many school hours are wasted dealing with kids that disrupt the classroom. It sounds to me as if this little guy is on his way to being one of those disruptors and it is up to the parents and grandparents along with the school, to teach him that that is not acceptable.

Who knows what the parents of the victim has told him? Maybe they told the over weight kid to kick the other kid's ass. If so, then we'll see where that goes and how that works for all concerned...
I'm betting not good, at any level.
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#20
(11-10-2013, 11:03 AM)gapper Wrote:
(11-10-2013, 10:49 AM)GoCometsGo Wrote:
(11-10-2013, 10:19 AM)gapper Wrote: So, help me out here. Since when is asking a parent to sign a paper that says they understand the problem and asking a kid to write an apology, such a big fuss and inconvenience? Where is all the drama here?

As GCG says, kids need to learn to deal with adversity. In this case, that also takes the form of being held accountable for your actions. It appears the little guy didn't get it the first few times he had issues and was "counseled" so the heat needs to be turned up a little, to the horror of grandma, who just can't accept that her little angel may need punishment to learn that unacceptable behavior is truly unacceptable.

This is how kids grow to get into more trouble. Adults in their lives need to hold them accountable for their actions. Signing a piece of paper and writing "I'm sorry" (I really doubt the school is expecting a multi-paragraph dissertation) is not going to crush the little guy or the adults in his life.

I'm OK with the kid's parents acknowledging the problem. I'm even okay with the parents telling the kid to make amends of some sort. I'm NOT okay with the school deciding how this is to be handled. IMHO, the situation has not yet reached that point.

I believe that the BEST solution is for the parents of the "victim" to use this as a learning experience for their kid. Teach him to stand up for himself.

We can't have the state stepping in and exerting authority over every little thing. Its a trend that needs reversing.
If the boy had been taught proper behavior at home, this would not be a school issue, nor should it have to be. Intervention such as this after a "few" other instances, is not exerting authority over every little thing, however, they have the right to exert that authority, as I see it.

If the family doesn't want the state mandating his conduct in a public school, they should send him to a private school. My tax dollars help pay for that public school. I want it teaching kids that you are accountable for your actions. If the first few warnings didn't work, it seems to me this was a natural progression.

Too many school hours are wasted dealing with kids that disrupt the classroom. It sounds to me as if this little guy is on his way to being one of those disruptors and it is up to the parents and grandparents along with the school, to teach him that that is not acceptable.

Who knows what the parents of the victim has told him. Maybe they told the over weight kid to kick the other kid's ass. If so, then we'll see where that goes and how that works for all concerned...
I'm betting not good, at any level.

Doesn't sound to me as if the parents or grandparents are being given any say-so in how this is going to be handled. If/when this ever rises to the level of "bullying" then I can see where the school will be forced to demand action. But I just disagree that we are anywhere near there yet.

IMHO, it is essential for us to let kids attempt to sort out their own minor problems. They need to develop skills for handling situations. The only skill that is being taught here is that authority will step in and handle every little thing.

Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing for the little turd to get popped in the nose.
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